Corey Asleep.

It has been over a year since I last wrote. Looking back at the last entry I made on this blog, I am still able to recall the emotions and memories that were playing in my head as the melt down happened. It is too often that I overwhelm myself. And perhaps, releasing what was bottled up in the form of sleepless, breathless nights; trembling hands and tears, helped me accept the inevitable situation and move on with life. My absence isn’t an indication that nothing particularly interesting or depressing happened. Matter of fact, so much took place the past year that I don’t quite remember what came first or last, or how do I string the events together to make it easily comprehensible and less… schizophrenic?

Changes were made, not necessarily welcomed at first but I eventually grew to appreciate it…or rather simply put, it was the acceptance of change that made me at ease. Dodgy mingling in broad daylight, questioning my beliefs and expectations on long stuffy bus rides, there were countless tears of confusion, disappointment and anger…. Ah, and I also found courage to do what I’ve always wanted to do, that is to be my own boss. That decision might well be the highlight of 2014, but it also hasn’t been an easy journey.

Talks of work opportunities are slowly increasing, at least for now these proposals are keeping me optimistic about my career path and finances. I told M the other day that hopefully soon, I might have enough to treat him to some good steak instead of a burger from Carl’s Jr. I know I sound pathetically broke, I really am for an expensive-city dweller but I also have been so blessed with genuine friends who understand my situation and willingly provide when I have nothing. I feel so ashamed of myself most of the time, and yet knowing how blessed I really am despite my situation makes me truly thankful, I could cry.

January ended too soon, so will February.

This year, I will smell the air of Spring for the very first time.